Your Nose is Big O. Are you…?

Oh yes,
Now that you’ve married and you start to put on a little weight, those are the questions you start getting. Sisi Yemmie had a lot of questions from fans (which is great when you have fans!). I have no issues with friends , family or fans(when I get them) asking me if I’m now pregnant but picture this.
I have a terrible cold and you know what’s going on with the face when you have a cold. I go to church and in a new department is a guy I say hello, hi to. We don’t talk so much. In fact, in two or three years we have probably exchanged 20 lines with each other.
So this guy sees me  and starts pointing to my nose and saying, “It has entered, abi? I can see”. OK, first of all, that’s so crass! But I calmly answer and say, no I’m not, I just have a cold. Next time, I’ll say the object the gave me to keep for him decided to enter through someplace else. I don’t have quick comebacks so it’s better to be polite.
He’s like, no. I must be pregnant even though I don’t want to tell him- look at my nose! So I tell him, it’s your opinion. Abi? And then another lady interjects and says it’s actually rude to keep asking a newly wed that question especially if you are not close to the lady. I mean,what if she was pregnant and lost it and you are just reminding her of what she lost or what if she has fertility challenges and you just put her in a worse state? Or, maybe, just maybe, they don’t want a child for now? Or is it that he doesn’t know my nose has always being “sizable” and now that I get inspected at every point, it must be that I’m pregnant? Like someone telling me, I’m flexible now because I’ve been having stretching exercises. Did you pay for yoga classes? Or you are now my yoga teacher?
I guess some people should stop trying to be familiar, abeg? I’m sure I have mistakes  relating to this but I can’t think of it. Most times, even when I know a friend is pregnant, I don’t say anything. When it shows, it shows.
On the other hand, it got me thinking. Has my nose really increased? Maybe he was trying to say that and couldn’t afford to be rude if he pointed to it directly. if my nose has increased in size…toh, it means I’m going to be wealthy?
Have you not noticed that 99 percent (my own stats) of wealthy people have prominent or enlarged noses? Check it and tell me.
Has this scenario I played out happened to you before?


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